To appoint unto them that mourn in Zion, to give unto them beauty for ashes, the oil of joy for mourning, the garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness; that they might be called trees of righteousness, the planting of the Lord, that he might be glorified. Isaiah 61:3
Are you bitter, sorrowful, empty, and filled with regret like Naomi?
Examining Naomi’s words in Ruth 1:20-21, it’s evident that she harbors deep unhappiness. She said, “don’t call me Naomi,” she told them. “Call me Mara, because the Almighty has made my life very bitter. I went away full, but the Lord has brought me back empty. Why call me Naomi? The Lord has afflicted me; the Almighty has brought misfortune upon me.” Naomi’s emotions are steeped in bitterness, sorrow, emptiness, and regret, stemming from the unfortunate events she has endured. Her husband, Elimelech, passed away, one of her daughters-in-law deserted her, and both of her sons, Maalon and Kilion, were lost. Naomi’s negative emotions are a direct response to the tragedies she has faced in her life.
Overcome like Naomi with the power of friendship
Naomi found solace from her negative emotions through her bond with Ruth. Originally her daughter-in-law, Ruth’s loyalty persisted even after Naomi’s son passed away. In Chapter 1:16-18, Ruth’s reluctance to abandon Naomi illustrates their enduring friendship. Ruth remained by Naomi’s side not out of obligation but as a true friend. Upon their arrival in Bethlehem at the start of the barley harvest—a symbol of new beginnings—Naomi’s life took a positive turn. Ruth’s journey in Bethlehem, leading to her marriage to Boaz and the birth of a son, brought blessings that restored Naomi’s spirits.
Ruth 4:13-17 describes Naomi’s new emotions of joy and thanksgiving following the new blessings in Ruth’s life at Bethlehem. ‘The women said to Naomi: Praise be to the Lord, who this day has not left you without a guardian-redeemer. May he become famous throughout Israel! He will renew your life and sustain you in your old age. For your daughter-in-law, who loves you and who is better to you than seven sons, has given him birth.” One of the ways to overcome emotional turmoil is by cultivating meaningful friendships as they can usher in healing and renewal.
10 Qualities of a good friend
- A genuine companion, such as Ruth, embodies sincerity.
- A reliable friend, like Ruth, lifts you up in times of distress.
- A loyal friend, akin to Ruth, demonstrates genuine care for you.
- A dependable friend, like Ruth, is there and not absent.
- A faithful friend, like Ruth, is someone you can count on.
- A supportive friend, like Ruth, genuinely wishes you the best
- A caring friend, like Ruth, desires your well-being.
- A true friend, like Ruth, empathizes with your pain and celebrates your joy.
- A compassionate friend, like Ruth, shows kindness towards you.
- A friend as good as Ruth is a treasure.
Are you traumatized like Tamar?
In 2 Samuel 13:10-20, we encounter one of the Bible’s most emotionally challenging stories, which portrays a distressing sexual intimacy between siblings, Amon, and Tamar. In the aftermath of this tragedy, Tamar’s brother Absalom tried to comfort her with the words, “Do not take this thing to heart.” However, if we open the emotional wounds of Tamar a victim of rape, incest, and sexual abuse we will find:
- Shame
- Embarrassment
- Self-inflicted guilt – a usual form of self-punishment
- Feelings of inferiority – a persistent sense of inadequacy and not measuring up
- Self-loathing – a profound dislike for oneself stemming from low self-esteem
- Lack of self-assurance – continual uncertainty and doubt in one’s abilities
- Anger – fueled by the inability to alter or undo past events
- Grief
- Unhappiness
- Self-pity – stemming from adverse experiences and encounters
- Traumatic memories
- Unforgiveness – the incapacity to pardon oneself and others
- Mistrust – a fear of individuals
- Regret – persistently wishing the event never occurred
The story of Tamar reminds us of how powerful and destructive damaged emotions can be. From research, women who have the experience of Tamar have the tendency to be emotionally fragile, emotionally unstable and to have and display emotional problems. In 2 Samuel 13: 19-20 the bible says of Tamar “She put ashes on her head, she tore the ornamented robe she was wearing, she put her hand on her head and went away weeping and she lived in her brother Absalom’s house a desolate woman.” The power of wounded emotions forced Tamar into shame, led her into sorrow and pushed her into isolation.
Healing emotional trauma with the balm in Gilead
To overcome such an emotional trauma, Tamar can replace the ashes on her head with the balm in Gilead. By doing so, she can experience deep deliverance and divine transformation. Trading ashes for beauty, Tamar can be beautiful again.
The Bible records her act of tearing the ornamented robe she wore. An ornamented robe, akin to a coat of many colors, symbolizes a colorful destiny. Tamar’s action of tearing her ornamented robe represents the damage to her once colorful destiny. However, the balm of Gilead, the anointing oil, has the power to repair damaged destinies so, Tamar can anoint herself with it.
As Tamar placed her hand on her head and departed weeping, her action suggests she has resigned herself to the belief that it is all over for her. However, the balm in Gilead possesses the power of renewal. Therefore, instead of being burdened by a spirit of heaviness, Tamar can be adorned with a garment of praise.
We are told that after the encounter, she lived in her brother’s house a desolate woman. The balm in Gilead is an anointing that advertises and promotes so Tamar can come out of isolation and desolation into glory and honor.
By applying the balm in Gilead, it is possible for Tamar’s sad story to have a happy ending.
If you can identify with the emotional challenges of either or both two Old Testament women, here are some prayers.
Prayers
- The spirit of Jesus Christ, magnetize good friends to me in Jesus name.
- The spirit of Jesus Christ help me to form quality friendships in Jesus name.
- The balm in Gilead, I receive your comforting and healing anointing in Jesus name.
- The negative emotional power holding me down, I challenge you with the fire of God and I command you to break away in Jesus name.
- The balm in Gilead heal the wounded parts of my life in Jesus name.
